Party at the Schoenecker Household!

Yeah that’s right. Par-taaay! A big ol’ PITY party. Yesss. This party has everything! Face-squirming sobs. Napping in contorted, fetus-like positions. Brief moments of cursing the world and all of its false hopes. Lions. Tigers. Bears. (Oh my!) [***Reader: For maximum appreciation, it is highly recommended you watch a few SNL Weekend Updates with Stefon.]

Bonus! This party also includes alcohol, popcorn and an ABC Family or Lifetime movie that is guaranteed to invoke a profuse amount of crying. [Note: during a normal state of mind, said movie typically causes an audible “Ugh,” followed by a swift and absolute channel change.]

Invites sent: 1. Number of confirmed attendees: 1.

#hmph                                                                                                                          

Ohhh kayyy. So, why all wallowing? Well guys, I just received notice that I did not get a job. This is a job I dedicated several hours and days toward crafting both the application material, AND a detailed project they subsequently requested in order to narrow the applicant pool from over 100 to just 15. And guess what? I was offered an interview! I made it to the top four!! Alas, I didn’t get the job. #CRUSHED. And to boot, I really really wanted the job. And I know I’d be great at it.

As per typical Vanessa protocol, in less than 24 hours of receiving this unfortunate news, I’ve already gone through several stages of emotion. The first stage, of course, is the “Woe, is me” pity party. But I’ve departed from that. I’m now in the “Lemons/Lemonade” stage. [Between these, of course, you’ll also find the “Screw those guys; they don’t even KNOW!” and the “Jam-out-to-loud-music-and-workout-until-I’m-too-exhausted-and-sleepy-to-care” stages).

So, lemons? Rejection is never fun, nor easy (especially for a particularly perfectionist gal such as me). But it is never ever a reason to stop doing what is most important to you, nor to stop searching for a way to do it even better. There’s a quote from a pretty cool guy that seems fitting here. Maybe you’ve heard it? “I’ve failed over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed” - Michael Jordan.

But, hold on. Wait a minute, Mister Jordan! You are a hero! You are an All-Star! You’ve gone down in history in the history of basketball players! When you talk about your failures here, you’re doing that in retrospect; from the perspective of an outrageously successful pro ball player!!

So there’s a bit of a difference. The average person is not going to reach such success and fame for what they know and love.  I’m certainly glad people can find inspiration from these kinds of quotes. In fact, very recently, while spending a small but cherished morning with my dad, I also learned that the book of proverbs can be used to serve a similar purpose. Here, people will selectively pluck out a proverb for their daily inspiration, moral lesson, or even bumper sticker. Snippets of hope. Morsels of morality. Words of wisdom. But there’s a difference between taking a few inspirational words and clumping them together from, well, from where I stand today. Don’t get me wrong, I once found comfort in these sorts of quotes and proverbs too. But now… now it’s different.

The difference? I can’t speak for everyone. But the difference with me is that I’ve got THINGS to do. I don’t have time to wallow (beyond 24-hours, that is) in self-pity! The earth is overpopulated; it is infested. Our climate is shifting. Dramatically. The time we’ve got is not a lot. So I must remember my own ‘pillars of faith’ as I journey my way into a career of environmental sustainability:

• Above all, love greatly and profusely 
  
• Love those who may be lacking in love – those who may not see that they are worthy of love
  
• Love those who love me (even when they turn away momentarily)
  
• And most importantly, love the air, land, rivers, seas, plants, animals, insects (even the darn ticks and mosquitoes!!!) in remembrance and thanks that each component plays a vital role in maintaining homeostasis and health on Earth
  

And this is what pushes me forward. In the words of a very wise and very dear friend of mine, “Yeah, not getting something that you know you'd be amazing for really feels like caca... [but] you are doing everything in your power to change your situation and that in itself is AMAZING.” Thank you, Miss Lisa Carol Farwell, my best friend since first grade, my comrade and compatriot who knows me inside and out, and my All-Star heroine (by the way, she, too, is doing everything in her power to change her situation).

p.s. I have another interview for another great organization next week. Stay tuned.